From the day we begin our journey on this planet we are taught to celebrate several milestones in our life. These milestones range from the first time you learn to walk to the first time you fall in love.
There is nothing comparable to the feeling of falling in love. And when it happens for the first time, it’s even more powerful. There is nothing like it. You get to experience emotions and thoughts that you’ve never experienced before. It’s almost like a dream that you never want to end. When I think about my first love, I remember how everything else seemed inconsequential in front of it. The only thing that mattered to me was that I should get to be with the person I loved, at any cost. But like most things in life, this too, isn’t meant to last. And when it does end, it teaches you some powerful lessons that you remember for the rest of your life. It teaches you that:
1. You’re Worthy Of Love
Your first love gives you the realization that there is someone outside your inner circle of friends and family who thinks that you are amazing. This person is totally besotted with you. Before this, you couldn’t have imagined yourself being worthy of someone’s affections, but this development changes that. It boggles your mind, but it also helps your self-esteem.
2. You Can Trust Someone Outside Your Inner Circle
Since it is your first relationship, it’s not tainted by machinations or pre-conceived notions. Therefore, you are more likely to trust someone outside your inner circle. It comes easily to you. And once you do learn to trust them, you reap its benefits.
It has its risks, but you learn that if you need this kind of love in your life then this is a risk you have to take.
3. Vulnerability Isn’t Weakness
We often mistake vulnerability for weakness, when it’s nothing but a quiet kind of strength. When you first fall in love, you give it your all, you bare your soul. In short, you hold nothing back for yourself. And when it doesn’t go the way you want it to, you learn to pick up the pieces and walk away. And you learn to be vulnerable without lapsing into cynicism.
4. It Sets The Course For Your Future Relationships
Your first romantic relationship sets the tone for the rest of the relationships, that you go on to have in your lives. And most of the first relationships come with an expiry date. So the way you end them informs your thinking about them in the future. No matter where you go, what you do, those memories and your first love continue to hold a special place in your life.
5. It’s Okay To Fight
Before this, you have this ideal notion of love where there is no room for strife. But after this, you realize that two people can be in love and still argue about things, and it can be just as healthy too. Arguments in a relationship do not signal the demise of love, rather they are an effective medium of airing out grievances and having more effective communication.
6. Loving Someone Is Not Easy
Humans are capable of the most generous acts and the vilest of thoughts, and that’s a truth you learn when you first get into a relationship with someone. No one is black or white, but almost all of us are some shade of grey. You learn that at times it might be difficult to accept this reality, but since your love can’t be conditional you must work at it.
7. You Should Keep Some Parts Of Your Relationship To Yourself
In your excitement to share your new experiences with friends and well-wishers, you tend to overshare. However, as you have conflicts and arguments, you realize the value of keeping some part of your relationships to yourself. You learn to put more weight on privacy.
8. Intimate Experiences Are More Soulful If Had With A Loved One
You learn the difference between casual intimate encounters and the ones had with a loved one. This is not to devalue any, both have their own merits, but when you have those experiences with a loved one, you connect with them on a much deeper, emotional, and spiritual level.
9. It’s Possible To Survive Heartbreaks
Perhaps, this is the most important takeaway from first relationship. When a relationship happens for the first time,it takes over your life with an all-consuming passion. You can’t imagine a life where that person is not with you. However, once that relationship ends, and as you try to pull your life together, you realize that it’s possible to move on. And years later, when you look back at this, you realize that not only have you managed to move on, but you have come out stronger after having done that.
Falling in love for the first time is a truly transformative experience that brings a lot of bittersweet experiences along with it. What did you learn from your first love? Share your observations with us in the comments section.
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